Hot Boyfriend Blog

Ok, here's what happened:

My tummy started hurting Thursday night but it wasn't horrible so I just went to bed.  When I woke up, my chest hurt like I had a gas bubble that I couldn't burp out.  I was off Friday since I'm on a compressed work schedule so I just hung out around the house.  I started feeling much better.  When I went back to bed Friday night, my chest started hurting again even more.  I sat up for a while and tried to burp.  I didn't burp, but felt better until a laid back down.  I figured it was some kind of heartburn so I blew it off again.  Late Saturday, I called PQ at his work and told him I should probably go to the hospital since my chest was still hurting and I was having trouble breathing (he had been trying to get me to go since day one).  We decided to wait until Sunday morning and go to the Urgent Care Center so we wouldn't have to wait in the emergency room.  So after another painful night, we went there.  

The UC center is awesome.  They took us in almost with no wait at all.  An older woman doctor that had a Hispanic accent and was an uncomfortably close talker took all my vitals.  She then told me it could be my heart and I should be admitted to the hospital to be on the safe side.  So I got to have a fun and wacky ambulance ride to St. Anthonys hospital.  The doctor at the ER took my vitals again including an EKG.  He said that I had just had a heart attack or was currently having one.  Then they gave me a Nitro pill.  It gave me a REALLY bad headache and I almost passed out.  PQ was there and he was kind of freaking out.

So they took me to the Cardiac ICU and started doing more tests.  My lungs had built up some fluid since my heart wasn't pumping as much as it should (that's why I couldnt breath right), so they decided to dehydrate me.  They gave me something to make me pee, but I was not allowed to get out of bed.  I learned how to pee in one of those plastic urinals that look like a bent milk carton.  At one point in the ICU, I had to pee really badly.  My room curtain was wide open for the world to look in.  Just as I started urinating into the bottle, some visitors of another patient decided to have a nice get-together in front of my room and started chatting away.  It really made it hard to go.  It wasn't even visiting hours, so they shouldnt have been there anyway, but I was too tired to yell at them.  Some people are idiots. A nurse finally chased them out.

They did more tests including an ultrasound on my heart.  This lady put a glob of grease on this round probe then proceded to jam it forcefully into my left titty.  It hurt and made my manboob all tender.  Eventually they decided I had pericarditis which is an inflammation of the sac around the heart.  It causes all these symptoms from the tummy ache to feeling worse while lying down.  It can be caused by lots of things such as viruses or allergic reactions, but is often a symptom of a heart attack.  My EKG didn't show most of the signs of a heart attack, but to make sure, they sent me to the Catheter lab to have an exploratory catheter and to put in stints if they found any clogs.  Some random nurse shaved my junk and then several other people became friends on a first name basis with my junk as they sterilized and stuck things into my groin.  I'm not sure why they have to go through the groin since that is not even close to where your heart is.  Well, everything turned out fine.  No clogs, drips, errors or anything.

I went to a regular room after that and spent one more night for a total of about 48 hours in the hospital.  It looks like I did not have a heart attack after all, and I should fully recover with no permanent damage to my heart.  Hurray!

What I learned:

• Hospital food sucks.  Its not just a rumor.  Icky.
• After a while you get used to urinating in bed and even miss the convenience a little after you've quit.
• If you're sick enough, you don't care if strangers are looking at your privates.
• It's really embarrassing to have to tell everyone you didn't have a heart attack after you told everyone you did.

The End.

HB

Hey Everyone!  Guess what, I had a heart attack!  Wait, let me rephrase that:  I had a fucking heart attack!!!!!  I'm only 43. This is not supposed to happen.  Why me FSM?  Why me?

It wasn't too bad as heart attacks go.  I'm not even sure exactly when it happened - some time last week I think.  I am feeling pretty weak, but I am home already, and PQ is taking good care of me.  I will have more details in a later post - if I live long enough that is.  Actually, I was told I'll have a full recovery and that my heart is not damaged.  Yea, pretty minor stuff.  Oh well.  It was still a fucking heart attack!!!  Or as PQ put it, "a teeny tiny heart attack."  Gotta love him.

So just to recap: Less than a year ago, I found out I was type 2 diabetic.  Last week, I had a heart attack!!!!! (that will always get multiple !'s) Next stop??? 

Anyway, pity party at my place. Bring presents.

 

HB 

Yea, that's right. I hate the fucking Girlscouts and their fucking cookies they push on the unsuspecting public this time of year - every year. Maybe that's a little strong and broad. My over-reaction (I admit it) may be slightly due to my finding out about a year ago that I have diabetes. I now realize that everything has corn syrup in it and it is effectively killing us all, and it's subsidized by The Feds of course.

Walking by the goodie table at work (why does it have to be right in my pathway to the bathroom - diabetics have to pee a lot) I am accosted by the site of neatly packaged rows of these delicious and evil cookies. I've resisted so far. Having the threat of blindness, amputation, and/or death helps you to resist things, but everyone else seems to gobble recklessly without remorse. Guilt of paying too much money for a product that's obviously bad for you is countered by the false reasoning that you're helping a good cause. Do they not know that each bite is a stepping stone to hell and damnation? I'm sure the scouts are gleefully aware of the consequences of the chocolate and sugar they are shoveling into the mouths of their all-too-willing victims as dollar signs replace their irises--cha-ching.

I remember my pre-diabetes, pre-awareness love affair with the cookie that was Girlscout-sold. The macaroons are delicious. There was a new lemon one that came out a few years before my diagnosis that was covered in delicate powdered sugar that melted in your mouth sweetly just before the tart lemony goodness crunch-exploded in your mouth. Yea, they were good--almost too good.

Now I'm learning to live with and even like sugar free cookies. They're still bad for you but not nearly as much. Before Diabetes smacked me upside the head, I hated sugar-free products. Diet soda was anathema to me and sugar free desserts made me screw up my mouth in disgust. Now I barely know the difference. I eat sugar free desserts like cookies (in moderation) without a second thought. I can hardly tell the difference from the real thing. How could I? I no longer am allowed to taste the real thing for comparison.

So things could be worse, but why can't there be more sugar-free choices. The grocery store has a few shelves of lite cookies and candies, but nothing compared to the aisles of delectables catering to the sweet tooth of the sugar-enabled. Not only cookies, but donuts, cakes, aisles of sugar coated cereal and pop-tarts. Bags of pure sugar itself, in several brands of brown, cane, powdered, or cubed. In contrast I've got the blue boxes, the pink stuff, and sometimes the crystal-like stuff in a box and a few food items here and there.

Why can't I have more choices? Where's my sugar-free pumpkin pie, my sugar free chocolate cake and donuts? Is food tech just not there to make these things possible? I find it hard to believe there's not a market for this stuff. The explanation has to be conspiracy and I'm looking squarely into your cute little mug, miss Girlscout thang standing all innocent-like at my front door.

hb

[update] There's a new girl scout cookie that's sugar free. They're blue for some reason though. What's going on here?

Well, I've gotten the diabetes. Too many Little Debbies(TM) (Hey! I just thought of this. They should rename them "Little Diabetes" - HAH!) and banana splits have done me in. Sometimes it seems the world is made of high fructose corn syrup. Read some food packages and you'll see what I'm talking about. Now I have to get insulin shots and watch my diet like a bitch. I've started a private blog of my meals, blood sugar levels and weight. Maybe I'll make it public at some point. Who knows? I got a new doctor and he seems pretty nice and as a bonus, he's kind of hot. He's given me A-plusses on my new diet so far. I haven't really lost any weight though. That's probably due to the fact that I have been neglecting to exercise - but I have an excuse...

Right after I found out I had the big D, I started developing a heinous sinus infection. I'm prone to sinus infections and they take me out of commission for a while. New hot doctor gave me some good antibiotics for it though and I'm recovering more quickly than usual.

Tomorrow morning will be the first time I administer the shots on my own. The needle the doctor gave me seems way bigger than the ones he used. I don't think it's entirely my imagination, so I'll have to ask him about that. I'm still learning about diet and sugar levels and Type I vs. Type II and so on. I think I'll make it through this ok. One day at a time and all that. And with PQ at my back, I can't lose.

HB